Yesterday, I attended a video production on gender advocacy. While waiting for the videos to get played I had the chance to have a conversation with the Gender Program Coordinator. We talked about sexual harassment, gender sensitivity and women empowerment ...and...marriage.
She agreed with me that husbands and wives should give each other space and respect each other's individuality. Being new to the married life, i told her that I, sometimes (most of the time:)), have found it difficult to submit to my husband. Some arguments are silenced down not because we have come into agreement with our views but because one has become tired of arguing. So she asked, "Did you understand what your husband meant to tell you? Do you think he is right?"
Most arguments that my husband and I have are work related. You see, we work in the same company and we often argue about procedures and protocols. The funny thing there is, most of the time we mean the same things. I often realize this before he does. That's why, my wicked stubborn self, gets to play with the limelight. I don't settle down because of two things: (1) I wanted to play with his arguments, turning it around until he gets confused and tired, and (2) I thought that I sometimes have to stand up to what I believe is true. I don't settle because I want him to be the one to let down his guards and agree to a compromise (even if I know that we want the same things)...
Then she (Gender Prog Coordinator) uttered a line that changed my view on feminism forever. She said, "SUBMITTING TO YOUR HUSBAND DOES NOT MAKE YOU LESS OF A FEMINIST..."
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